Friday, December 25, 2009

How to Overcome Anxiety Attack

Many anxiety attack sufferers wish to know how to overcome anxiety attack permanently. Although the process require much time and effort, it is more important to understand the thinking and logic behind it.

One of the most important steps in learning how to overcome anxiety attack is to come to term with your anxious feelings. Everyone experience a certain degree of anxiety in their life, this is perfectly natural and normal. However, a lot of sufferers want their anxious feelings to go away, and that logic is wrong itself.

Anxiety is part of life, it need to be there. Its is neither healthy nor desirable to be rid of it forever. Sadly, this is what most sufferers are doing, trying their best not to feel anxious. In their haste to overcome anxiety attack, they are actually worsening their condition by trying to be rid of anxious feeling. Come to term with your anxiety, accept it.

More recent research have also indicate that anxiety attack is linked to the body's natural response to danger. By learning how to recognize these responses, you can make adjustment to change them.

Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is widely used to correct the irrational fear associated with these responses. Regardless of what your afraid of, it is possible to unlearn that behavior that make you anxious. Imagery techniques and relaxation skills will also be taught during CBT and they can help you to gradually learn how to overcome anxiety attacks.

Keep in mind that regardless of which techniques you choose to use to overcome anxiety attack, you must believe in them and practice them daily. Its normal to experience set-backs when training to overcome anxiety attack, the main point here is to not give up hope. Such techniques take time, but the rewards as well worth the effort. Imagine being able to overcome anxiety attack permanently, no more taking of medicine and drugs to control it.

Don't keep hiding and running away from anxiety attack. Left untreated, anxiety attack will slowly take over your life, seriously crippling your ability to live a normal healthy lifestyle. Take action now , take control of your life and make an effort to overcome anxiety attack!

Thursday, December 17, 2009

How To Overcome Our Tension

Mental Tension is related to psychology and human beings suffer from tension because of many reasons.One of the possible reason could be when some work is not going according to our wish and might be something is happening against our wish or the results of some event might be against our expectation and so on...

We dont come to know as to how and when the tension might attack us, but still I am giving some 5 ways to overcome such tension. The only need is that the person who is suffering from tension should understand he is suffering from tension when actually he is suffering from tension and he has to realise because of what reason he is under such tension. For that just do these steps and then think about the reason. I have given the 5 steps just do this.

1> Take a few deep breaths and relax on a sofa. This may relieve your headache. Take a deep breath, hold it and then slowly let your head, arms and shoulder relax, as you exhale.

2> Brush your tension headache off. Put hair brush on your right temple and brush in small circles, working towards the back of your head. Repeat it on the other side. Then brush in small circles from the top of the head towards the back of the head. Brushing improves the blood circulation in the head, the lack of which may be causing the headache.

3> Exercising is a great way to keep off tension headaches. It tones up the system, improves circulation and generally makes you feel good.

4> Shut your eyes and relax. Just imagine you are lazing on a hammock close to a lake by the mountains. Hear the birds chirp and the wind rustle through the trees. In a few minutes your tension world have dissolved by the healing powers of the mind.

5> Take a walk. Many doctors suggest walking as a way to reduce tension headaches, since the body releases endorphin, the natural painkillers.

These are the some steps to be followed.Try this.

The next question is that,is that it is necessary to take tension?.Whenever i feel that i am taking tension i just sit quiet and think, if i take tension or not then also the result will be same.Then why to take tension!Is't it is a simple solution for the tension takers like me!

Another simple way to come out of the tension is just take it granted that GOD IS THERE,And god will help you at any condition and god is the parent of world and we are his children. No parent does any bad thing to his /her child then how does the god will do bad for us!.Just leave everything on god and proceed forward.ANY WORK WITH GOOD THINKING WILL DEFINITELY GIVES GOOD RESULT.Just believe this and you will be out of tension.And for this you need to believe me!

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Focus On Positive Things

Conflicts and disagreements are part of our lives. We all will experience it at one time or another. When we have conflicts, the important thing to remember is NOT to cling onto the problem and get stuck.

We need to be able to find ways to resolve our problems effectively and move forward.I know it's easy to say and harder to implement, but it's your life that you need to concern yourself with. Don't envy others, but instead appreciate the things you do have. Being single seems fun, and sometimes it can be, but there's a lot of comfort in knowing that you've got someone home waiting for you. Plus, your spouse can help you with a lot of life's responsibilities. The young and single don't have that luxury.

When you focus on the good things you don’t have near as much time to focus on the bad things. This simple shift in frame of mind has been so powerful in every aspect of my life. I also find that focusing on being grateful and appreciating what you have is a great way to shine a positive light on things.
Justify Full
I know that all you've got going on is a real drain on your time, but always keep in the front of your mind the idea that school isn't forever. It's just for a little while and then things will settle down. So always look for the light at the end of the tunnel, and that can really help you keep going.

So in short, stay positive, stay focused, and appreciate all the little things you have which make your life unique and wonderful.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Overcome Your Fears

Fears are educated into us, and can, if we wish, be educated out.”
Karl Augustus Menninger

“The enemy is fear. We think it is hate; but, it is fear.”
Mahatma Gandhi

What is holding you back?

Whatever you answer, it will in many cases boil down to fear in some form.

Now, fear can be useful to keep yourself alive. But many times, especially if you live a life where you have the possibility to reading these words, fear is just a big obstacle in your path.

But what can you do about fear? How can you overcome it?

In this article I’d like to explore a few of the timeless things that people have learned about that throughout the last few thousands of years.

1. Face your fear to become stronger.

“I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.”

Frank Herbert

“You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’ You must do the thing you think you cannot do.”
Eleanor Roosevelt

Every time you face a fear you gain the 3 important qualities that Eleanor Roosevelt mentions above. And the next thing that comes along will be easier to handle.

And if you have to handle a big fear, whatever it may be, and later realise you actually survived it, many things in life you may have feared previously seems to shrink. Those fears become smaller. They might even disappear.

You might think to yourself that what you thought was a fear before wasn’t that much to be afraid of at all. Everything is relative. And every triumph, problem, fear and experience becomes bigger or smaller depending to what you compare it to.

But to gain a wider perspective of human experience and grow you really have to step up and face your fear.

2. Facing your fear can be surprisingly anticlimactic.

“When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson

This is perhaps my favorite quote about fear. From a distance and in you mind things may seem very difficult and frightening. But when you actually step up and take action I think many of us have been surprised of how the beard of that bully just comes off. Why? Let’s move on to the next tip…

3. Take action and get busy.

“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”
Dale Carnegie

“Worry gives a small thing a big shadow.”
Swedish proverb

You can’t sit around think and waiting for courage and confidence to come knocking on the door. If you do, you may just experience the opposite effect. The more you think, the more fear you build within.

We often build scary monsters in our heads.

Maybe because of things we have learned from the news, the TV or the movies. Or we just think so much about something that our minds start to create totally unlikely horror scenarios of what may happen.

As you may have noticed in your own life, 80-90 percent of what we worry about never really comes into reality. Instead things can become anticlimactic when we take action. The beard of the bully comes off surprisingly easy if we just step up and take action.

And many times we get the courage we need after we have done what we feared. Not the other way around.

4. Fear is often based on unhelpful interpretation.

“Fear: False Evidence Appearing Real.”
Unknown

As humans we like to look for patterns. The problem is just that we often find negative and not so helpful patterns in our lives based on just one or two experiences. Or by misjudging situations. Or through some silly improper communication.

When you get too identified with your thoughts you’ll believe anything they tell you. A moe helpful practice may be to not take your thoughts too seriously. A lot of the time they and your memory are pretty inaccurate.

But this is a good thing too.

Because it opens you up to re-examining old beliefs you have based on experiences you may have interpreted in not the most helpful way. It opens you up to try again and see what happens this time instead of staying stuck in thought, inaction and fear.

5. Don’t cling to your illusion of safety.

“Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. The fearful are caught as often as the bold.
Helen Keller

“Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature…. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.
Helen Keller

Why do people sit on their hands? Is it just because they become paralyzed with fear? I’d say no. Another big reason why people don’t face their fears is because they think they are safe where they are right now. But the truth is what Keller says; safety is mostly a superstition. It is created in your mind to make you feel safe. But there is no safety out there really. It is all uncertain and unknown.

You may get laid off.
Someone may break up with you and leave.
Illness will probably strike.
Death will certainly strike in your surroundings and at some point come to visit you too.
Who knows what will happen?

This superstition of safety is not just something negative. It’s also created by your mind so you can function in life. No point in going all paranoid about what could happen a minute from now day in and day out. But there is also not that much point in clinging to an illusion of safety. So you need to find balance where you don’t obsessed by the uncertainty but also recognize that it is there and live accordingly.

As you stop clinging to your safety life also becomes a whole lot more exciting and interesting. You are no longer as confined by an illusion and realize that you set your limits for what you can do and to a large extent create your own freedom in the world. You are no longer building walls to keep yourself safe as those walls wouldn’t protect you anyway.

6. Be curious.

“Curiosity will conquer fear even more than bravery will.”
James Stephens

When you are stuck in fear you are closed up. You tend to create division in your world and mind. You create barriers between you and other things/people.

Curiosity on the other hand is filled with anticipation and enthusiasm. It opens you up. And when you are open and enthusiastic then you have more fun things to think about than focusing on your fear.

Curiousness also opens you up to gain understanding of something. And with understanding vague, fog-like fears disappears.

The emotions you experience are often as a result of what you focus your mind on. Change what you focus on about something and you can change your emotions about that thing.

How do you become more curious? One way is to remember how life has become more fun in the past thanks to your curiosity and to remember all the cool things it helped to discover and experience. And then to work at it. Curiosity is a habit. The more curious you are the more curious you become. And over time it becomes more of a natural part of you.

7. Remove separation. Remove fear.

“Who sees all beings in his own self, and his own self in all beings, loses all fear.”
Isa Upanishad, Hindu Scripture

The ego wants to divide your world. It wants to create barriers, separation and loves to play the comparison game. The game where people are different compare to you, the game where you are better than someone and worse than someone else. All of that creates fear. Doing the opposite removes fear.

That there is no real separation between beings, that we are one and the same, might sound a bit corny.

But one thought you may want to try for a day is that everyone you meet is your friend.

Another one is to see what parts of yourself you can see in someone you meet. And what parts of yourself you can see in him/her.

There is often an underlying frame of mind in interactions. Either it asks us how we are different to this person. Or how we are the same as this person. The first frame is based in how the ego likes to judge people and create separation to strengthen itself (either through feeling better or more like a victim). The second one creates warmth, an openness and curiosity within. There is no place to focus on fear or judgment anymore.

This is of course not easy, especially if you have held the first frame of mind for many years. But you can get insight into this by doing the rest of the things above. As you face your fears the barriers and separation you have built in your mind decreases. You come closer and feel more of a connection to other people.

With action, curiousness and understanding we come closer to each other. We gain a greater understanding of ourselves and others. And so it becomes easier to see them in you. And you in them.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

How To Get Rid Of Tension

Tension and stress are amongst the worst enemies of a person. Though initially they affect the mind, it is not long before they start interfering with the physical health of the person as well. Right from hypertension to loss of appetite, there are many harmful consequences of taking too much tension. In case you are also suffering from excess mental strain and anxiety, it is the time to take some serious steps in this regard, lest you end up falling prey to mental and physical ailments. In the following lines, we have listed some natural ways to get rid of tension, to help you out.

Natural Ways To Relieve Tension

Take a Nap
When you are feeling too stressed out, try taking a small nap. It will not only make you feel much lighter, but also refresh you up. Even if you are not able to fall asleep, at least lie down with your eyes closed and try not to think about the things that make you tense.

Get a Massage
One of the best ways to get rid of tension, naturally, is to get a massage. Head, neck and shoulders are the body parts most affected by tension. In fact, the most visible physical signs of tension include headaches and stiff neck and shoulders. Get someone to massage the areas gently.

Meditate
If you know how to meditate, then practicing it will be the most apt remedy for getting rid of tension. Indulging in meditation helps calm your mind to a great degree, in the process helping you relieve tension. So, select a quiet corner in your house or office and start meditating.

Practice Deep Breathing
Though few people realize it, practicing deep breathing exercises goes a long way in removing tension from the mind. Originally a part of yoga, the exercises can be practiced in isolation as well. As you start breathing deeply, you will experience your tensions melting away.

Listen to Soothing Music
Have you ever experienced your spirits soaring when you listen to a rocking number? Music is believed to have a great effect on the mood of a person. If you are feeling tense, play some soothing music, put the lights on dim, close your eyes and recline in a comfortable position. Think about the good things in your life and let yourself drift with the music.

Friday, December 11, 2009

Life Has Ups and Downs

Every aspect of life is a series of ups and downs. You have summer and winter, day and night, work and play.

You clean the house and all of a sudden the dust has built up again. The laundry is clean and then you look and the laundry basket is full again.

You get a job and you may lose it. You fall in love and then back out of love. One day may be full with energy, another full of challenge just to get out of bed.

That is the dependability of life; it is full of ups and downs. How you handle them is up to you. It is easy to deal with the ups in life. They are enjoyable and inspiring at times.

You anticipate with excitement the prospect of an upcoming trip. You will have time off from work. You are visiting a destination you have never seen before with lots to do and see. You absorb every minute of the trip and it flies by. The day comes when you awake to find it is the last day of vacation. It’s time to return to the job, the house and the day to day activities. You have just experience the up, the vacation, and the down, returning to every day life.

Would you have missed the up of the vacation just not to experience the possible down of retuning to everyday life? Probably you would not have. You know that a day or two back into your everyday life and you will be back on track. Life will have leveled off a bit until the next up and down cycle.

There is a popular saying when challenging times appear. “This too shall pass.”
Well this is just as appropriate when the wonderful things of life come. Life has ebb and flow to it. It is never static.

So how does one approach the ups and downs of life?

1. When you are in one of the up times enjoy it, absorb it and learn from. Affirm to yourself that you are truly deserving of good things and stay present to what is happening.

2. Do not project onto the future with thoughts of “this is too good to be true, it’s going to turn bad any moment.” Don’t waste time trying to look for signs of a down time approaching. Definitely be aware of your surroundings but looking for demons when they are not there wastes time and energy.

3. When you realize you are in one of the down times of life, a lost job, a failed romance, or even just a plain old singing the blues kind of day, take solace. You have experienced good times before. That is your best evidence that you will experience them again.

4. Take a realistic look at the situation. Are there adjustments you can make? Can you take steps to regain your equilibrium? In the most basic cases you just may need to take care of the cleaning, shopping or laundry again. In a tougher case you may find your self updating a resume or brushing up on your networking skills. Assess and correct wherever possible and then take a breath and try to relax.

5. Remember that experiencing a down time in your life does in no way mean that you are living a bad life. You are not a victim nor do you have a black cloud over your head.

6. Step back and take an overall view of your life. The greater majority of folks asked will acknowledge that their lives have contained a mix of ups and downs and that they have learned from both perspectives. It is in experiencing the downs of life that we gain greater enjoyment from the ups in life. In experiencing the ups of life we gain the assurance that we can withstand whatever the downs in life may bring.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Take Everything At Ease



Today a new sun rises for me; everything lives, everything is animated, everything seems to speak to me of my passion, everything invites me to cherish it.

Ann De Lenclos


Cheer Up or Feel the Blues?

Let's face it, some days we just feel blah. Call it the blues, mild depression, a let-down after a fun weekend, or just a bad day, we all have those days when we're not feeling tip-top. Should we try to cheer up and reach for a positive attitude, or just go along with feeling a bit funky?

Research indicates there are definite advantages to taking some steps to cheer up. People who feel positive most of the time appear to not only be happier, but are healthier, too.

There are times when cheering up isn't an option. When a big-time tragedy or set-back strikes, feeling better personally is the last thing on our minds. In those situations, we're better off allowing the sadness or grief to run its course, as long as it gradually improves.But for those times when our blues have just seemed to settle around our shoulders for no apparent reason, there are many ways we can consciously improve our mental state.

Life is in our hand Whatever circumstance you face be always relaxed and take your life as you wish, never dance to the tunes of circumstance take it everything with smile so that you are free of worries and live cheerfully and also cheer up your surroundings,so everything become complacent and your life will be more enjoyable. Do it from now don't procrastinate good things that comes to you. Best of luck for your bright future.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Five Easy Ways To Be Smarter

In life, many opportunities are tied to what other people think of you. If the people around you think you are smart, you are more likely to get asked to participate in projects that will enhance your career. If people think you are dumb, you’ll probably be passed over.

Assuming that you are actually smart you don’t have to fake anything. Your goal is to make people think of you as a smart person. Humans aren’t particularly good at judging the intelligence of someone else. Here are six things you can do that will help enhance people’s perception of your intelligence.

1. Ask More Questions

Asking intelligent questions can showcase your intelligence much more effectively than showing everyone how much you know. There are several reasons for this. The first reason is that most truly intelligent people are extremely teachable–that is how they became so intelligent. If you are trying to act smart without exhibiting teachable behavior people will think you are a fake.

The second reason asking questions is effective is because almost everyone thinks of themselves as smart. By asking questions you give them a chance to showcase their knowledge–something most everyone loves to do. Since they consider themselves to be intelligent and you are asking questions about the areas where they consider themselves to be experts, you must be intelligent as well–after all you are interested in the things that they consider to be important.

Obviously you can’t go around asking extremely stupid questions. You want to show what you know in a way that allows them to talk. Consider the following question when talking to someone who deals with furnaces and air conditioning units:

I was reading about geothermal heat pumps. What do you think about them? Are they really as efficient as people say?

You’ve displayed your knowledge, but left room for them to be the expert. This will make you appear far smarter than simply giving a monologue that tries to illustrate how much you know.

2. Be the Last to Speak

Don’t be quick to talk. If a matter is being discussed let others speak first. Taking the extra time to refine your thoughts can make a big difference in how you are perceived. If you have the final word and simply summarize the good points made by everyone else, people will remember your contribution more than the people who really came up with the idea. I’m not suggesting that you steal others ideas, but restating the best ideas (even when giving others credit) will make you look smarter.

3. Cite Your Sources

Random information seems suspect. Referencing your source can be very valuable in how you are perceived. I’ve been around some people who act like they are an expert on everything. After a while they start to appear like a know-it-all, and people suspect that they are just making things up.

Citing your sources can be as easy as saying “I read a newspaper article that said…” or “If I remember the paper correctly, some scientists say…”. Citing your sources will make you appear more credible, humble, and it gives you a way out if you are wrong.

4. Enjoy the Arts

In a culture where most people’s entertainment consists of movies and television, you can set yourself apart by going to the ballet, opera, museums, etc. For example, assume you are talking to two coworkers of similar esteem. You ask one what he did over the weekend and he says, “I watched Simpson reruns.” You ask the other and he says, “I went to see the opera.” Who will seem more intelligent? Obviously the person who keeps harping on the fact that they went to the opera is going to be considered annoying. But diverse cultural experiences are often mistaken for intelligence. As long as you aren’t trying to flaunt your experience it can make you appear smarter.

5. Take a Contrary View

This has to be done delicately. Simply disagreeing with everyone around you will not help. However, having a well reasoned position that is different than others shows you are capable of independent thought. You must be careful not to insult the people. Keep in mind that you are probably not aware of all the relationships that exist. Taking the position that the CEO of your company is doing a poor job while talking to his daughter will not make you look intelligent.

Here is an example: I personally feel that The Nutcracker has single handedly done more damage to ballet in this country than anything else. Most people’s exposure to ballet is seeing The Nutcracker around Christmas time and the plot is so incredibly boring that Americans as a whole have formed an unnecessarily low opinion of how stories can be conveyed through classical dance.

This opinion is probably contrary to most people’s views, but it provides an excellent starting point for a conversation (assuming I’m talking with someone who is at least slightly familiar with ballet). Even if you disagree with me, as long as I’m not presenting my ideas in an arrogant manner, the conversation has a reasonable chance of helping establish me as someone willing to think differently than the average person.

Monday, December 7, 2009

Maintain Healthy mind

The world is not to be put in order; the world is order, incarnate. It is for us to harmonize with this order."
-- Henry Miller


“Without peace of mind, life is just a shadow of its possibilities.”
-- Jean Borysenko


There are moments when you feel you’re not yourself. Your mind is in turmoil. This feeling robs you of your innate ability to be all you can. The storms in your mind rob you of your creativity, zest and passion for living. Without these qualities, you are a shadow of yourself.


You have the power and the ability to be the master or mistress of yourself. However you need serenity to be able to master yourself and your destiny. Therein lies the importance of maintaining your body’s software, the mind, in top notch shape. It’s like maintaining your computer regularly to rid it of malwares and viruses. These are some of the practices that can help.


· Devote sometime to be still and know yourself.

· Cultivate productive relationships as they serve as buffers in times of need.

· Read widely. By so doing you come to realize that you are weaving the same tapestry as your next door neighbor. In other words you're in this together.

· Volunteer and give of yourself. Selfless acts wipe the tears from the face of a suffering neighbor. When this happens you forget your own tears.


“If there is light in the soul, there will be beauty in the person. If there is beauty in the person, there will be harmony in the house. If there is harmony in the house, there will be order in the nation. If there is order in the nation, there will be peace in the world.”
-- Chinese Proverb


"As human beings, our greatness lies not so much in being able to remake the world -- that is the myth of the 'atomic age' -- as in being able to remake ourselves."
-- Mohandas Gandhi

Sunday, December 6, 2009

How To Get Success In Interview

Self introduction is about how you introduce yourself and is something you must work on once you have been invited to an interview. You must get ready to create the image of someone they will definitely want to hire above all other job applicants.

Everybody has an opinion as to how you do that, but what do you actually do and what do you say?

Self introduction is your key to interview success because you are starting from a baseline position where they have no experience of who you are or what you are like. Yes, they should have read your resume and cover letter you sent in, but that only gave them enough for them to want to see you in person. Now you are going to meet the hiring manager in person, you have a one-off make or break opportunity to get them to see you as the only person they want to employ.

As you know, interviewers will often rely heavily on their first impressions, to the extent that the interview becomes merely a confirmation of that first impression, either good or bad. So if self introduction is your key to interview success, the first and most important aim is to create a positive first impression. Everybody has an opinion as to how you do that: look 'em in the eye, give 'em a firm handshake, speak up and don't mumble; know your stuff. All good ideas, but what do you actually do and what do you say?

Create A Favorable First Impression

The way to create a favorable first impression is to be sure you appear confident and open. When you meet your interviewer for the first time, make eye-contact at the introduction and repeat the interviewer's name as you shake hands and thank them for inviting you to the interview. As you get seated, smile to indicate you are ready to get down to business.

What often follows is the invitation to 'tell them about yourself' which allows you to commence your self-introduction that is so important to your interview success. This is the phase where you develop the rapport that will carry you through to the positive outcome at the end of the interview.

Because self introduction is your key to interview success, you must have previously prepared exactly what you are going to say. This is not some lengthy story about your life, but a short focused statement that sounds interesting to the listener. You make it interesting by keeping it short (less than 3 minutes) and by showing that you are interested in both the job and the organization. This means you need to do some research about the business beforehand.

Strengths And Achievements

In your self introduction you will include some examples of your strengths and achievements which relate directly to the requirements of the new job. This must also demonstrate your personal qualities that you apply when you are doing the job because the type of person you are is often far more important then just having the ability to do a job.

The way you outline your self introduction, in particular the way you speak, tells the interviewer whether you are confident in your abilities so you must rehearse it well, but don't try to be what you are clearly not - you'll only be found out at a later date. Get a friend to listen to your self-introduction with a critical ear, because if it sounds false it will set the alarm bells ringing with the interviewer who will detect that it is not the real you and destroy the rapport you were building up.

Practice speaking faster or more slowly, louder or quietly and try to vary it throughout.

When you have prepared your self introduction, ask yourself this question: 'What does the interviewer need?'

The answer is that the interviewer needs to identify the best candidate to hire, whilst keeping the costs to a minimum and the fewer people interviewed the better. The need is also for the person who appears to be the best 'fit' in terms of both personality and technical ability. Also remember that they may need to justify their decision to hire you, to someone higher!

Prepared well, this self-introduction is your key to interview success because it helps to create that all-important first impression, helps you to build the rapport with the interviewer and satisfies the questions about whether you are the sort of person who will fit in to the organization successfully.

Peter Fisher is an Interview Performance Coach and Webmaster for www.Your-Career-Change.com The 'Killer Interview Secrets' package above scored highly in our recent interview guide reviews and I'm going to make you a special offer when you purchase it.

Go to my Career Changer's Guide page where you will find all of the information you need, including templates , samples and charts, plus interview answers so you'll feel the difference when you approach each step of your career change more confidently - knowing you have all the knowledge it takes to win the job you so want.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Folow Simple Way Of Life

'P' asked "Shekhar, why do make life so complex. Why don't you just "be". Acceptance is beautiful once you truly understand it...keep living in the moment...."

Your statement " Acceptance is truly beautiful if you understand it" is so beautifully stated. It is what I am trying to do. Understand what acceptance means and strive towards it. Acceptance cannot just mean cowardice or inaction. Acceptance must lead to purity of action. Where action is separated from the result of that action. And how do I separate myself from the result of my action ?

That was what I was trying to come to terms with in my last post. That what we call 'result' of our actions is often independent of our action. It has an individuality of it's own. It has it's own life and often the relationship is the other way round. We are caught up in the Karma of the event (the result s we call it), and assume ourselves as one of the cause.

In fact the Universe in it's true nature has no place for words like 'cause' and "result'. The result and the cause are intertwined in an eternal bond, which is part of a universal matrix of the play of the universe.

So what does "Acceptance is beautiful when you truly understand it" mean unless you experience the the idea that time has a linear value only if you desire it. Or your Ego does, for it needs to see a distance between cause and result. The Ego needs to contextualize it's actions by the result (or imagined result) of it's action to know that it exists..

Yet this duality was what Buddha meditated over - trying to come to vision of Shunyata, of a vast emptying of the mind off our Ego and experiencing ourselves as in Unity with existence, where time and space have only imagined existences.

Yes, you are right 'P', 'Acceptance is beautiful when you truly understand it' ..... but I have a long way to go before I can truly get there. The journey began as a little boy reaching out to the idea of forever, and still goes on. You sound like you are much further ahead than I am, so I would love for you to share your experiences with our community.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

How to Face Problems in Life?

Sometimes, we welcome problems. But during other times we try really hard to avoid them. But aren't we constantly looking for ways to better face them? here's something to read:

Tired of a life of struggle, a young woman sought her mother's advice. She told her how things were so hard for her and how she was unable to cope with problems. Her mother took her to the kitchen and filled three pots with water. In the first, she put carrots, in the second, she put eggs and in the last, she placed coffee beans. She let them boil without saying a word. Twenty minutes later, she turned off the burners and asked her daughter, "What do you see?"

"Carrots, eggs, and coffee," the daughter replied. The mother drew her closer and told her to feel the carrots. She did and saw that they were soft. She was then asked to take an egg and break it. On shelling, the daughter found a hard-boiled egg. Finally, she was asked to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled, as she tasted its rich aroma.Perplexed, she asked, "What's your point, mother?" Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity -boiling water - but each had reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting, but soon turned soft and weak. The egg, when put to the test, had hardened. However, the ground coffee beans were unique. They had changed the texture of the water and filled it with their aroma. "Which are you?" she asked her daughter. "When problems knock on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?"

There is much to learn from that fable. Which one are you? Are you the carrot that seems strong, but wilts in the face of pain and adversity? Are you the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but hardens when in adversity? Or, are you like the coffee bean, which actually changes the water, the very circumstance that brings the pain, by its fragrance and flavour. When the hours are the darkest and trials are their greatest do you elevate to another level? There lies the secret to solving problems and handling adversity.

Problems are part and parcel of life. But as they say, where there's a will there's a way. For every problem, there's an alternative course of action. You just have to find it.

The most natural course of action is to evade the problem or just wish it away, but problems, like cancers, usually stay around and spread. So, it's better to confront the situation before it becomes an emergency.

The real problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem. When you accept problems, you also learn to have a contingency plan. For instance, when you know there is a danger of fire, you keep extinguishers handy. The important thing to remember about conflicts is that they happen all the time and they are actually opportunities disguised as problems. They provide us with better ways to fix what needs to be fixed and improve what needs to be improved.

And since most problems are man-made, solutions are within our reach. There are two reasons why we tend to see a problem as a problem: the fact that it has to be solved; and our apprehension about the outcome of the solution.

Here are some tips that will help when the going gets tough:

Move On - As Ford said, "Don't find fault, find a remedy. Focus on what to do next. Spend your energies on moving forward toward finding the answer. Don't just panic as `worry is like a rocking chair - it gives you something to do but won't get you anywhere." Learn to think `how' rather than waste time with futile "ifs".

Understand the Problem - Problem solving is the ability to make careful choices. The steps to be followed are: understand the problem; gather the facts; set up the problem; estimate what the outcome should be; work it out; and check the answer. Ask questions, clarify facts and evaluate options to find a workable solution. That's the formula.

Think straight - In problem solving, it is important to have the right mindset. It helps to be open-minded and have the ability to think out-of-the-box. When you have broader vision and unique ideas, you have more tools at your disposal which helps fix the problem better.

Say it with a smile - A prerequisite in any situation in life is the ability to laugh in the face of problems. It really downsizes the enormity of the problem. A sense of humour maintains a sense of balance as it prevents people from collapsing with grief and worry. Humour is more than just being funny; it helps keep things in perspective.

Teamwork - Two minds are better than one. It does help to have more people involved in solving a problem, both for moral support and for the greater range of experience that they can bring to the problem-solving table with their outlook and personality. It adds depth to the troubleshooting team. As Voltaire said, `No problem can stand the assault of sustained thinking.'

Brainstorm - When it comes to problem solving, ten ideas are better than one. Each idea is worth considering, as the most unlikely one might just be the answer. Resist the temptation to find quick short-term solutions. It tries to put the solution at the beginning of the process, when what is needed is a solution at the end. People have an inborn trait to solve problems if they only just take the time to grasp the situation without panicking.

Write it all down - Keep a record of what is going on. It helps in future problem solving when you have it all in black and white. During a crisis, your memory banks can be scarcely relied upon.

One for all and all for one - This is a critical step that is usually missing. Interests are needs that you want satisfied by a given solution. The best solution is the one that serves everyone's interests. This is the time for active listening. Forget your differences for a while and listen.

Learn from past mistakes - One must be big enough to admit his mistakes, smart enough to profit from them, and strong enough to correct them. Learning from problems is growth in the right direction.

Problems are to the mind what exercise is to the muscles; they toughen and make you strong. When the going gets tough, the tough get going. Maybe you don't feel all that brave and strong, but just the act of confronting a problem head-on is a step in the right direction.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Improve Your Reading Skill

Improving your reading can be one of the most important steps you can take in order to enhance your business life as well as your personal life. No matter what reading level you may be at at the present time, you can improve your skills by increasing your reading speed as well as your level of comprehension.

We were taught to read words starting at the left side of the page and proceeding across to the right. As our eyes move across the written page of words, our eyes tend to make short, jumpy movements. Whenever our eyes stop on a word, that is known as fixation. Some people tend to fixate on one word at a time across the page. This makes for slow, awkward reading. The best way you can improve your reading speed is to fixate on a larger group of words at a time. Learn to avoid fixating on words like a, an, the, or, etc. These words are insignificant and can usually be scanned over without missing the point of the story and essay etc. The larger the group of words you learn to fixate on, the faster your reading speed will become automatically.


Another hindrance to speed in reading is the practice of moving your lips while you read. Moving your lips is simply a way of concentrating on the material that you are reading. It is a negative practice that tends to slow your eye movement down. Think about it- what can move faster, your lips or your mouth? You can put an end to this bad habit by consciously making yourself stop moving your lips. As your reading speed increases, you won't be able to hold onto this bad habit because your eyes will be moving too fast.

Lack of concentration is another typical problem area in reading. You can conquer this problem by practicing to improve your concentration every day. Set a short amount of time, such as ten to fifteen minutes on your kitchen timer. Have your book or other chosen reading material ready, and start reading. Block out any background noises that you may hear. Make a conscious effort and ignore everything else in the room except the material you are reading. When the timer goes off, immediately stop reading. Now, test yourself by recalling what you have just read. Check back to the text and see how much information you actually remembered. If your recall wasn't very good, re-read the text and time your self again, then try to recall the information once more. Practice this reading exercise every day and increase your reading time.

Like everything else that is worth doing, practice makes perfect, and the more you read, the better reader you will become!